Posted in Real Talk, Talk Back Tuesdays

Leave the Side Chics Alone!

Yup, you heard me and no I’m not a side chic. I’ve never been one before.

Hello beautiful people!

Question of the day: If your spouse cheats on you, who do you blame? Do you blame yourself, your spouse or the person they cheated with?

I have noticed a rather disturbing trend where some wives move heaven and hell to confront, beat up and even in some cases, hurt the side chic (because their husbands were innocent men who were hunted down by the side chics 🙄).

Let’s discuss this real quick.

So my husband came to see my family, asked for my hand in marriage and we proceeded to plan our marriage ceremony. In front of our families and friends, we got married and promised to stay together till one of us dies. Now I don’t see how, if for some absurd reason my husband decides to cheat, I will leave him be and go confront the lady he cheated with.

how sway

I have been trying really hard to understand the rationale behind women attacking side chics (physically and/or verbally) and I just don’t get it. I have heard so many different explanations and none of them makes sense to me.

If there’s a reason why you think women should do this or if you’ve done this before, kindly share with us in the comments section.

The most surprising reason that I’ve heard so far is that women have to speak to the side chic to make them understand that they need to respect their fellow sister’s union and stay clear off their man.


When did all of us women become such a close knit, loving sisterhood? Let’s be honest. I’m all for unity among women and women supporting one another but unfortunately no matter how hard we’re all trying, we are not really there yet.

I did an opinion poll and 98% of the people I spoke to responded that they would hold their partners responsible for stepping out on them, not the side piece.

The remaining 2% said if their spouse cheated, they would first examine themselves and try to find out if there was something they were doing wrong or not doing right. I was actually impressed because that line of thought is quite different from the norm.

What do you think about this? Kindly share your thoughts in the comments.

Dear wives, you are in the marriage with your husband, not any side chic. Your husband is accountable to you just as you are to him. It seems a lot of wives forget to hold their husbands responsible for their actions and tend to blame others instead. Instead of rushing off to engage the side chic, please speak with your husband first. Let him explain himself, let him explain to you why he broke his vows. It is not okay for your husband to cheat on you and it is certainly not okay for you to be fighting off side chics.

Side chics owe you no allegiance, your husband does. They do not have to consider your feelings or be concerned that they’re breaking up your beautiful family, your husband has to.

What do you think guys? Do leave a comment and let’s have a discussion. I would love to read your thoughts and views on this topic!

Love always,

Mrs A.

If you’re currently going through challenging times and you’d like a listening ear, some encouragement or motivation, please contact me here:

***Talk Back Tuesdays is a new interactive segment where we get to talk and share ideas on the topic of discussion, so be on the lookout every Tuesday. Videos will be included soon on my social media pages so check out the links down below the page, follow and subscribe! ***

SIDE NOTE: If there are any topics you guys would like us to discuss, kindly let me know in the comments or you can send them to my email: I’ll be looking forward to hearing from you all!



I'm a young wife, an encourager and a writer at heart, walking in my purpose and following God's lead. I’ve got a heart as big as my hips and I love reaching out to people who are hurting or suffering in silence. I know everyone goes through something at some point in life and through my writing, I want to make such people know that no matter who they are or what they go through, they can count on me to be there for them. Follow my journey as I share my life experiences in the hope of making you go a little harder at whatever you do. 💞always. Mrs A the encourager.

4 thoughts on “Leave the Side Chics Alone!

  1. If your spouse cheated on you, then only the spouse gets the blame.
    Never an excuse for cheating.
    Only time the side chick gets the blame is of she is a close friend of yours or family member. If you don’t know the side chick personally, then there is no reason to take your frustration out on her becuase your husband is the one that should of been faithful in the first place. The side chick don’t owe you any loyalty, your husband does.
    Only time I can see where a person might blame themselves is if you didn’t put 100% effort into the marrige and you neglect to give your spouse any attention and failed to communicate. This will make your spouse feeling lonely and they may seek attention from somebody else. But still, cheating is wrong regardless and under any circumstances no one should get a pass for cheating

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Exactly! No one should get a pass for cheating and side chics shouldn’t get attacked either when they’re not a part of the union. Cheating is a selfish decision.
      I believe sometimes people do know when they’re not putting in much effort that’s why they’d blame themselves for a partner cheating.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. My thoughts exactly ☺️

    I think in our minds, we see the man as “weak and unable to control his sexual desires” and believe the other woman has more control of herself, and thus should be held accountable.

    However, I’ve always believed that there is no way a side chick could force herself in a man’s life, he had to make room for her, thus he is responsible ☺️

    Liked by 1 person

    1. And that’s so wrong. Everyone should be able to control themselves.

      I just want women to understand that it’s only what their husbands allow that would continue. You are so right! No side chick is being forced to be in any man’s life.

      Thanks for reading and sharing your thoughts! ☺️

      Liked by 1 person

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